Tuesday, January 31, 2006

She however....

When I got married to Carol, I promised to Love no other woman .........




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She on the other hand made no such promise

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Murali,

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In conjunction to yesterday, the 30th of January.....
The night of the 30th actually......

This was when zippy said "Too good kano.... Tumba olle kelsa madide kano", right when i was in the middle of being very happy.... I wanted to use another word here.... Hey i WILL what the f*** its my blog right? right in the middle of me gratifying myself...

If you remember that, then u will probably very clearly remember the sequence of events after that ..... How u dug a grave for urself so gloriously, what u felt, what u should have felt, (on second thoughts even NOW, one day after the incident, I do not know what i should have felt... nor do i know the things that exist inside ppl's hearts and minds... guess u can never get that close)

I have lost the will to (live??! no no not fade to black me is talkin abt) write abt cheerful topics like :

1) A trip to shimoga and surrounding places i went to with my bro's friends n all
2) A trip to talkad that i went with my friends n all
3) A movie called hazaaron khwahishen aisi that i watched and an encounter i had at cool joint, 4th block... not just abt the encounter but the place and the ppl there...

Well hazaaron .... its just a movie, if asked to describe, brings one phrase to my mind... "You wana discuss about it a lot!!" .... So many things to talk about in that movie... Maybe she has had an overdose of u kano.... U never know ...
Anyways, in that movie, the heroine is a very powerful character... I saw so many things in her, which if applies in general to all women, makes a woman a scary person... For instance, she does so many things for love.... She does so many things for HERSELF !! andre, for her own satisfaction, comfort, security, wellbeing, a huge linked list of other descriptive emotive words, she just does totally inexplicable things .... some scenes in the movie still nanna kannige kattida haagide !!

Ashte kai nouta ide...

Friday, January 27, 2006

Is it wrong

To ask for support from ur friends from time to time ?
To ask for "COMPANY" from ur friends from time to time?
To like somebody?
To admit u r weak?
To have thoughts which make u go green on the inside itself? (Yes ansatte... nange esht sali antha thoughts bandbittide andre they seem normal to my F***ED up twisted self)

To write this blog?

To wish for something? (No)
To wish for something that U ARENT "ALLOWED" TO? (YES maga... enlightenment)

ALLOWED is the right word..... It means : U don have the right to do it/wish it

It may also mean God telling u that u dont deserve it....

Murali vapas bandu odo idanna.... Gnyapsko pls.... idella gnyapsko

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Shit I've grown up !!!

I didnt see this coming... Suddenly u (i) r an adult... U know it... just like u know when u are in love........ Especially when u count the number of things u are supposed to do in a day and its an overwhelming number and not even one single task is something fun, like sit and watch tv !!!!

Fix you by coldplay running as the mood to add crap to my bag started forming in my head....

Some phrases which are coming to my mind a lot in the past few days....

".... It just hasn't hit me yet that we are outta college and into a job...... things are so much more complicated here with nobody to tell u what to do and so many unknowns....." - May not be completely correctly worded, but frm an anony friend of mine

"..... I know some people are having trouble letting go of the past and how we were back in college........ But I for one will never feel bad if someone is not in touch with me cos he is busy with work....... " - Almost got everything as was said this time, another anony friend of mine.....

"....... College time na enjoy maadrappa, idakkinta time illa..... nimge college mugiduhoda mele gottagatte eshtu important and chenagiro dinagalu ivu anta.... eega enu ansalla nimge but ondu job anta bandmele gottagatte...... " - This is 99.100 % verbatim, heard when his highness (me) was suddenly woken up in one sleepy drowsy lecture class in college by Mr BahBoo himself with some sudden inspirational but kinda true "gyaan" !!! Anybody wanting a translation can leave a comment

Where are we (we not as a group of ppl... not the crazy 88s kill bill inspired, but we as in each one of us individually) headed?!?! Already an issue of a visit to a certain place with certain ppl on a certain day has shown so many things to me..... Sometimes i am finding it difficult to manage things at work and home, with time not being allotted to home issues and weekends just flying past me..... one thing i AM able to manage now murali, is my shuttle schedule kano. Parvagilla satisfactory levels ge aagta ide.... innu swalpa jasthi madana anta ideeni nidhaanavaagi....

ashte tata